Mindful Compassion

It’s so easy to judge people, isn’t it?  They do something you think is weird/inappropriate/wrong, and the negative thoughts start coming.  I’m sure the argument could be made that such thoughts were protective at some point in history.  That distancing ourselves from those who were different from us and surrounding ourselves with those who were similar kept our species alive longer or something.

But in modern times, why do we continue such an awful practice?  Do we put down others to help ourselves feel better about our own weaknesses?  That doesn’t really move us forward.  It doesn’t strengthen those weaknesses in any way; it only distracts us.

As I was scrolling through Facebook tonight, I saw a few things that I initially thought were weird/inappropriate/wrong, but instead of letting my mind continue down that cruel path, I replaced those thoughts with compassion.

Have you heard of mindfulness?  It’s being aware of the moment — your thoughts, your feelings, your body, the environment around you.  I first learned about it in grad school, and it’s been a helpful tool.  It’s hard to be fully present in this fast paced world, so it takes practice.

But mindfulness is what enabled me to catch those not-so-positive thoughts and redirect them.  I started looking for the good in the scenarios my mind wanted to judge.  I considered the difficult paths that may have brought those people to those places, those decisions.  I thought about the poor choices I have made in the past and how I am not that different from them. We’re all looking for the same basic things — love, acceptance, praise.  Sometimes we don’t get those from healthy places and we become susceptible to receiving them from less than ideal sources.  When we’re in that place, the last thing we need is more judgment.  We need mercy if we are ever going to find our way out.

I’m relieved that I caught myself and was able to change my thinking, but I want to do even better.  I want to start with compassion and work toward eliminating senseless hostility altogether.

This will be my commitment:

Rather than looking down on people I don’t understand, I am going to strive to look for the best in them.  I will seek to give them the benefit of the doubt.  I will find some logical reason for that seemingly crazy behavior or choice.  I will extend kindness and mercy first, out of humility, knowing that I am only where I am today by the grace of God.  Who am I to judge?

“Let there be peace on Earth, and let it begin with me.”
– Sy Miller & Jill Jackson –

Photo Credit:  Ian Schneider, https://unsplash.com/@goian